Thursday March 28th, 2024
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Middle Eastern Aphrodisiacs

For a region that hates to talk about sex, we sure do have a lot of ways to make it better.

Staff Writer

Zallouh

Zallouh is a herbal Middle Eastern plant made from the root of the herb Ferula hermonis, which grows at the height of 2000 metres above sea level. According to folklore, King Solomon and Queen Sheba used the herb as a love potion or aphrodisiac during biblical times. Its chemical powers and benefits were studied and confirmed by doctors and scientists a few years ago, and the word spread worldwide. The traditional Lebanese way to take this herb was to slit the root and wait for the resin to ooze out.

Bananas

High in Potassium and vitamin B, this phallic fruit accelerates testosterone production, which may explain why male Egyptians can't help but blurt out Mozaaaaa anytime they see a mishmish to harass.

Ambergris

Ambergris (an extremely rare, fat-like substance that comes from whales) is cited in Arabic folklore as a powerful sexual aid. There are some reports that ambrein, the main chemical component of ambergris, greatly increases copulatory behaviour in laboratory rats, although this is a long way from validating its reputed effect on humans. These days, ambergris is highly valued by perfumers as a fixative (allowing the scent to last much longer) but has largely been replaced by synthetics. 

Hash

Since the Middle Ages, hash and its cousin marijuana have long been considered to provide people with a stronger libido and more pleasurable sex. This may explain why often in Egypt you can find groups of guys who like to spot and shizz.

Lettuce

Lettuce often appears in Egyptian art associated with the god Min, the god of the desert and of lightening and sandstorms. He is also known as the god of procreation and fertility. Min was symbolically represented by the lettuce and the phallus. The ancient Egyptians purportedly possessed a book of love agents that contained recipes for aphrodisiacs, many of which may have been prepared made with the lactucarium of wild lettuce. The book is long lost, and can only be found in references in ancient texts; therefore the Egyptian’s recipes for aphrodisiacs based upon lettuce are unknown today.

Baboon Poo

Baboons were very popular in Egypt, admired in ancient time for their intelligence and alsotheir sexual lustfulness. Baboon feces was an ingredient in Egyptian aphrodisiac ointments, and sometimes kept as pets. Many tomb scenes show the animal led on a leash, or playing with the children of the household. It is believed that some baboons were trained by their owners to pick figs in the trees for them.

Figs

Did someone say figs? Turns out figs are one of the oldest known aphrodisiacs and apparently can do it all; improve health, stimulates lasting erections, delayed climaxes and increased fertility. Seems like a sexy miracle especially when cut longitudinally, which many suggest look like private parts.

Cook Door's Viagra Sandwich

An explosion of seafood put into a sandwich that self-proclaims itself as the king of aphrodisiacs. We can't honestly claim it is the king of aphrodisiacs, but it surely will do a better job than a Whopper.